One of my least favorite things is when I express my opinions on a given topic and the other person simply “agrees”… Nothing to add, just “you’re right.” Now, I know, who doesn’t want to be agreed with? Right? It’s not the agreeing that bothers me, it’s what does that mean? What’s behind that agreement? You agree, but how is that reflected in your life choices?
This is specific to people I am well acquainted with, clearly I don’t know enough about everyone in the world for this to be a blanket statement.
Agreeing is similar to apologizing. I brought to your attention that your behavior was disrespectful or what have you and you apologized, but what does that apology mean, if you continue on with that behavior?
It’s as though “agreement” and “apologies” are placating techniques. Again, I’m not saying this is true across the board, we have all been agreed with in a genuine way or have received a genuine apology. But, these words, these ideas are used to keep one from truly acknowledging the topic at hand and the insincerity of it is astonishing. What’s more astonishing? The silence that fills the room when you express these thoughts.
What is the point of communicating if it’s not REAL? So, you keep your thoughts to yourself. No one is listening anyway, right? But, then you wonder why am I even bothering with these people when keeping my thoughts from them is the only way for me h to feel like I’m not being ignored? Now, I’m not myself. This affects how I navigate these people, this affects my mood at times. This, however, does not affect them. What do you do with that energy?
The energy of not being acknowledged.
It can be caused by so many things.
Here are these courtesies I use out of respect. Common courtesy. But, you don’t use them. Somewhere in there is the energy of not being acknowledged. I tell you, that your friend is very disrespectful to me and yet you continue to bring them in space. The energy of not being acknowledged. I say something that you don’t want to hear, so you purposely avoid me for a week, as to avoid the conversation. The energy of not being acknowledged.
How does one live with this energy?
Once you realize this has less to do with you and more to do with them, it becomes easier. When you decide, is this the energy I want to be surrounded by? When you see past the frustration and recognize that these things can only bother you, if you allow them to.